Stop pretending you have it all together.

As parents and as humans, sometimes we feel the need to act like we have it all together all of the time. We are afraid to let people in, afraid to let people see the “real” us, flaws and all. We are afraid of failure, afraid that when people see the ugliness they will run away or want nothing to do with us. OR that that the facade will be up. When you live life this way, it all comes crashing down eventually. Trust me on this.

If I can give you a word of unwarranted advice, here it is:

  1. Let people in.
  2. Don’t be afraid to be real and ugly. Those worth being in your life won’t run. They’ll embrace you.
  3. Getting help doesn’t mean failure. It means you’re wise enough to know it’s time to reach out to others.
  4. No one is perfect. People are comforted to know your imperfections, because it makes them feel better about their own.
  5. Your life will be better for it.

The end.

 

 

7 thoughts on “Stop pretending you have it all together.

  1. unproductiveatreproducing says:

    This. So much. I have learned it quickly through years of infertility and now as a parent. I used to think it was a flaw that I am an emotional person and those emotions come out in full force when I am at a breaking point… now I think it might actually be one of my strengths.
    Great post… If we all were able to do a little more of this, some of the “mommy wars” might stop. We’re all losing our shit just a little bit.

    • Tales of a Twin Mombie says:

      It’s so true! So many times moms feel the need to outdo each other or compete. It’s easy to post the pictures of the clean house, the kids with their act together, and such – but what’s behind the scenes? That’s the part I can relate to the most! Life is messy, parenting is messy. A wonderful kind of chaos. If we could all be a bit more transparent. Thanks for your feedback!

  2. randomsqueaks says:

    Amen! I can’t even get it all together long enough to take a family photo, so who am I to judge others or even attempt to present a false front? Admittedly, I may try to write about happier things on my blog but I think I’ve been pretty honest about the hard times too.

    • Tales of a Twin Mombie says:

      Yes you have! Honesty comes with a price, so I get why people are more reluctant to write about when things go wrong. It’s something I personally am working on too! But I think it makes us all feel a bit more human, flaws and all. And I can relate to you about the family photo!! haha! We get one good one a year! If we’re lucky!

      • randomsqueaks says:

        I talked my husband into getting professional photos done by a friend, and other than one lucky picture my mom got last summer of all four of us looking and happy-ish, they’re my only family photos! I didn’t understand why people got professional photos done before but I do now.

        • Tales of a Twin Mombie says:

          Yeah!! My best friend is a photographer and my husband does it as a hobby so that helps! If not I guarantee you we would have zero pictures because it’s always chaotic trying to take a family picture and harder as they get older! Trying to keep two toddlers still = close to mission impossible.

  3. TheDaddyBlitz says:

    Very true. Airing the family’s dirty laundry is something we are taught not to do from an early age, and yet that laundry is what we need help and support from other Christians. I am definitely guilty of this. Have been in small groups before where people pour out their souls, yet I have a hard time sharing. Thanks for the nudge.

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