*Warning* This post is kind of a “complaining” post. I have struggled with infertility and find myself incredibly blessed to be pregnant, and with twins at that! However, there are some things that I do miss and today I’m going to write about it. Don’t take this as me being a jerk..I’m just being honest. There are so many things I absolutely LOVEEEE about being pregnant (the topic of my next blog post probably) but there are things I miss as well. Proceed with caution! 🙂
So I’m turning into a little Miss Cranky Pants. At 33 weeks I’m measuring around 36-37 weeks…cankles have become a part of my daily look..everything is starting to ache and I’m feeling a bit useless. I can hardly sleep at night and so my days I spend like a zombie, trying to nap away or just feeling super exhausted. I think it would be easier to sleep if I had more space to sleep but I can’t bring myself to kick hubby out of the bed. I’m an emotional mess. Yesterday I cried because I thought my husband was mad at me (he wasn’t. I was overreacting to nothingness.) We went to my Aunts 50th birthday party and as soon as we walked in we were asked to take a picture, as it was a favor for us to keep. I said no, that I wasn’t “in the mood” and was “tired.” What a little brat I was. My poor cousins were baffled because I’m always cheerful and positive, especially when I get to see my family! I later apologized and took the picture. I’ve been a bit of a hot mess.
Thank The Lord for the patience of my husband.
Please don’t get me wrong. Being pregnant is truly a blessing and a miracle for us. I am SO grateful. But I also think it’s human and normal to experience feelings of “Oh Lordyyyy help me!” as well lol.
So is it okay if I just keep it real and share the things that I miss? The minor, insignificant things..
1. Regular clothes and skinny jeans.
I miss cute little summer dresses with cute little wedges and actually being able to shop in Forever21 (I know I know, but it’s one of my fave stores..don’t judge me). I really miss skinny jeans with a stylish ballet flat or gladiator sandal. My feet have simply not been the same during pregnancy..obviously..so Old Navy flip flops it is! I’ve tried squeezing my fat feet into some of my sandals but it ain’t happening.
2. Drinking as much Coke as I want to and devouring all the chocolate I want to.
I know there are women who continue with their regular caffeine regimen while pregnant but I definitely cut down, especially on my soda intake. But Cherry Pepsi…how I miss you.
3. People not talking to me when I go places.
I miss being able to run in a convenience store and out…or to go grocery shopping and keep to myself. When you’re pregnant, everyone wants to ask you questions and give you advice. My personal favorites – Are you going to have a
C section? Sure, lets discuss my birth plan in the middle of Target. Not that its any of your business. Another one, “what are their names?” We are still deciding and I don’t want to tell you. Sometimes I’m simply in a rush and don’t want unwarranted advice or opinions! I just want to pick up some cheese in peace.
4. Being Miss Independent. I have to rely on hubster for pretty much everything at this stage of the game. Bending really hurts me knees and I’m not supposed to lift heavy things anyway. Sometimes after a busy day my body just tells me to “stop” and I listen. This means a lot of my tasks that I would normally do, my husband has to do after a long day at work. This makes me feel pretty bad I like a complete nagger. He doesn’t mind, but I do. Even a simple task like cleaning, requires me to recruit my mom or someone to help.
5. Seeing my feet and painting my toenails.
This one I can’t complain too much about because I’ve made it a point to get pedicures every 2-3 weeks..Now if only I could actually see my feet. I did manage to paint them yesterday…how I managed, I don’t know. But it happened. Accomplishment and a half.
6. Bike riding.
Bike riding is my summer hobby. I’m obsessed. Not mountain biking or racing or anything, but literally cruising on an old school banana seat bike. My yellow lemon dream. She sits upstairs untouched this season. My best friend and I typically would ride bike all over town, have long convos, wind in our hair and sunshine on our face. Because I’m “high risk” and so far along in pregnancy it’s not something my doctor recommends and my husband flat out has said “no way.” I can respect that. But I miss my little lemon cruiser! Until next season my dear..or perhaps in the fall!
7.Having control over my emotions. I once cried over the fact that I really wanted a cheesy gooey pizza…but didn’t have my debit card. I cried yesterday because I thought my husband was mad at me. That’s one of about a million occasions where I have cried over ridiculousness.
8. Sleep. Sleep? What’s that? When I sleep I have about a zillion pillows all around me. Under me, between my legs, propping me up, under my feet. It’s pretty intense. The only time I can sleep decently is when my husband goes to work and I have the whole bed to myself. I have more space that way. However, I would rather not sleep too great than kick my husband out of bed. I know he would be willing..but then he would have a hard time sleeping on the sofa. So for now I nap when I can and squeeze in those Z’s when I can.
For the things I “miss” there are about a zillion things I absolutely love about being pregnant! I know that these things I “miss” are only temporary and everything is worth the joy we are experiencing of being pregnant. I just like to keep it real too..that’s just me. Feel free to comment and share some things you miss or that drive you crazy and on my next post, you can rave all about the things you love love love about being pregnant.